During one of our recent Too Much of a person (TMOAP) planning meetings, we veered a little off course and started discussing experiences of being ‘catcalled’.
I reminisced about the time I was stopped on the street and told my “yellow skirt looks lovely on me” by a large, bald black man in Japan. A thoroughly enjoyable experience which I would welcome more of.
However, my fellow teammates shared memories of being viciously harrassed on the streets from a very young age. Phrases such as “Get your tits out” and “suck me off, sugar” had been thrown at them as early as 12.
Unfortunately, the stats indicate that their experiences are far more common than mine. Studies conducted by Hollaback!, a global, people-powered movement to end harassment, have reported that globally on average 84% of women are harassed on the street before they turn 17, with 90% of British women experiencing street harassment for the first time during puberty.
I’d be curious to see the “success” rate from a catcallers perspective. Has anyone ever taken up on the offer to suck a stranger’s cock in the middle of the day? Or flashed their tits when requested in such a gallant manner?
The motivation behind this kind of behaviour towards women is absolutely alien to me. Is it pack-mentality power play? Or do these people think they are genuinely complimenting the recipient?
Regardless, verbally assaulting women is not acceptable and it should stop.
Some of our TMOAP participants have shared their experiences with us of how they dealt with/called out their catcallers (coming soon!!). I think my first instinct in that kind of situation would be to ignore it and walk away, but is my silence at the expense of many others going through the same experiences? Should we speak up and shut down this kind of behaviour in that moment? Is it worth the risk to your personal safety? Can we actually change the mind of an assailant by calling them out on it?
More importantly, why should the onus always lie with the victim? Why aren’t these catcallers shamed by their friends, family or other passerbys for behaving like this? Bystander intervention is crucial in these situations; the next time you witness this, you can help by calling the harasser out on their behaviour. Several governments have attempted to tackle this by fining catcallers, France being the latest to pass a bill that would fine catcallers upto €750 for street harassment.
So to catcallers everywhere, when you feel the urge to spew something vile towards an innocent passerby, try actually complimenting them instead.
I enjoy being told I look nice, have lovely eyes, a warm smile etc. Asking me suck your cock may result in receiving a tongue lashing, but not the kind you had in mind.
If you still can’t tell the difference between a compliment and harassment, then just SHUT UP.
